Struggles

I use to look back on those years before marriage, before children, when I had all the time in the world for "quiet times" with God. Time to read, study, write, pray. It felt so spiritual. I felt so close to God. I felt good about God and I felt good about myself. I use to think those were my "spiritual years." I was so "good" at quality time, and quantity time "with God."

You can't trust your feelings.
        ~Mom

My opinion has changed now. Those really were not the "spiritual years." They were the easy years. The less needful years. Less maturing years. Less deep years. Less understanding of what it means to know God's nearness, and a lack of understanding of what it really means to be held by Him.

I won't pretend this hasn't been a challenging summer, and in all actuality it has been a rough year.  Battles, not just with my circumstances, and my boys, but battles with me and my lousy attitude and habits. I constantly feel like I am under assault, and I'm just plain worn out.

For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms             

                ~Ephesians 6:12

Challenges make us cling - cling to something, or someone. It's just a matter of who that someone will be, or what that something is.

I'd like to say I always look to the Someone who is the only way to get through challenges successfully. But I don't. And there is no way to get through challenges in life if we are self-consumed like I have been.

I need to come to a point in life where it's okay if all I can utter is, "Thank You, Father. . . for this."

The Truth is I can tap into God and His power no matter what situation I am facing:

As the rain and the snow
come down from heaven,
and do not return to it
without watering the earth
and making it bud and flourish,
so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater,

so is my word that goes out from my mouth:
It will not return to me empty,
but will accomplish what I desire
and achieve the purpose for which I sent it. (emphasis mine)

                                     ~Isaiah 55:10-11

The answer to keeping God’s power with me and working in me to produce victory over myself is letting His Word get inside me. His Word seeping into my mind and my heart will accomplish things – good things – powerful things – things that help me to

"fight the good fight".

I don’t have what it takes to revolutionize my entire life. But God does — and He lives in me. 

His divine power has given us everything we need for a godly life through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness.
          ~2 Peter 1:3

God's plan for my weakness is to  make me dependent on Him. God never wastes a painful experience. He wants more for me than to be constantly struggling in an unending cycle of defeat.



Dear Lord, I was made for more than getting stuck in a vicious cycle of defeat. I trust You and want to acknowledge You in ALL my ways. Help me to remember I was made for more with each choice I make. Help me Father God, to choose you and your Word. Let it fill me with your power.

Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.

        ~Galatians 6:9

Always Seeking Higher Ground,

Nora