God's Weaving~Stones of Remembrance

"Time is the most undefinable yet paradoxical of things; the past is gone, the future is not come, and the present becomes the past even while we attempt to define it, and, like the flash of lightning, at once exists and expires..."

        ~Charles Caleb Colton

Six and a half years ago ago my eldest son entered my life. Just a toddler, he came to us from a Russian Baby Home and broke my heart and soul wide open.

         And today that son has turned Nine years old!

I praise God for giving me this son. God has used him in my life in ways he'll never know, and though he was not woven and knit in my womb, he is eternally and intrinsically woven together with me. His transformation cannot be separated from my transformation. He has challenged and changed me in ways I had been able to avoid most my life.

           But after he came, I couldn't avoid them any longer.

Being his mother has pushed me into character I had been content to live without.

There are many reasons why I love him.

As I look into his sometimes smiling, sometimes sullen face,

I am a reminded of those reasons

and they are marvelous!

   We are connected in ways deeper than blood, he and I. 

  Part of God's royalty, us two. Two of kind;

Both of us growing wild,

undergoing transformation...

as we are grafted into God's family tree

through adoption.

And you, being a wild olive, were grafted in among them and became partaker with them of the rich root of the olive tree...They also, if they do not continue in their unbelief, will be grafted in, for God is able to graft them in again.
           ~Romans 11:17, 23   

For all who are being led by the Spirit of God, these are sons of God. For you have not received a spirit of slavery leading to fear again, but you have received a spirit of adoption as sons by which we cry out, "Abba! Father!"
       ~Romans 8:14,15

I love you, my son.

Your creativity, your passion, your brilliance,

your deepness, your overdeveloped sense of survival

and your hesitancy to trust,

have been planted smack dab in the middle

of my dry, barren ground. 

May your roots cling to me as my soil clings to you.

                  

     And together may we grow, and become a memorial to our Lord.

                                                        

                    The first planting in the Almighty's garden.

Happy Birthday

Lord, let me live this short season that I have with my son to the fullest. Keep me strong, selfless, and filled with Your grace and mercy. Help my children know without a doubt that my love for them is true, though imperfect. Pour out Your Spirit on my offspring, making them steadfast as trees firmly planted by Your flowing stream. Let them grow up to be fed by Your water...the water of Life so they don't thirst after unrighteousness, and temporary pleasures. Call them out of the world to be claimed as Your own, wholly devoted to You.

I will pour my Spirit upon your offspring, and my blessing on your descendants. They shall spring up among the grass like willows by flowing streams. This one will say, 'I am the LORD’s,' another will call on the name of Jacob, and another will write on his hand, 'The LORD’s,' and name himself by the name of Israel.

        ~Isaiah 44:3b-5

Always Seeking Higher Ground,

Nora

Ephipanies~Stones of Remembrance

Sometimes life is just living from epiphany to epiphany. It's what truly makes this journey worthwhile; these snapshots of revelation.



Though these hours here are full, concentrating on character issues and biblical instruction for these boys of ours, I  actually sometimes get these occasions, when I realize that I wouldn't take away or exchange any of the moments I've had with them. Though many days have been difficult, especially our first year, every once in awhile I choke, realizing one day it will all be silent,

       and they will be gone. 

In those mornings someday, like now, I imagine still not wanting to rise up from bed. I might still be curling up like a cocoon, still pulling the covers high up over my head. But I know that then, my eyes will be shut tight to hold back tears... and there will be an empty spot in the hollow of my chest, aching from the memories of the good ol' days. 

God is in the midst of her; she shall not be moved;
God will help her when morning dawns.
               ~Psalm 46:5

That is why I stop and want to snapshot moments into my memory...

Like when youngest gets such a Lego bug in his head, that he talks morning till noon till night~ NON STOP~ about the wonders of Star Wars legos and how he can't wait till Christmas or his birthday, which ever comes first.

Like when... after I give a blow pop candy to my eldest, he gives it back to me two hours later...      
 

                          ingeniously decorated as a snowman.

Or when his garlic bread at dinner;

becomes a skull 

Like when I take my youngest into my arms and hold him close as he cries, soothing his broken heart because the stray dog he'd grown attached to is gone.  Or the way my eldest son prays before he goes to sleep at night. When he comes before God, he remembers and earnestly confesses all the wrong deeds from his day. They can be many; there are no short bedtime prayers in this house.


Even like the night time ritual of me, worn out, sitting in the hallway, waiting for the boys to go to sleep after I've been told... "I love you higher than heaven, and deeper than the deepest ocean, and wider than a desert, and prettier than a blooming flower, and...." until finally I say... "Enough already; go to sleep!" Whereupon I'm wished sweet dreams, gumdrop dreams, Gumby dreams, Gumby and Pokey dreams with sugar plums and candy canes and...

                                 you get the picture.

                            But more importantly...so do I.

S L O W D A N C E



Have you ever watched kids
on a merry-go-round
Or listened to the rain
slapping on the ground?


Ever followed a butterfly's erratic
flight
Or gazed at the sun into the fading
night?


You better slow down
Don't dance so fast
Time is short
The music won't last


Do you run through each day on the
fly
When you ask "How are you?"
do you hear the reply?


When the day is done,
do you lie in your bed
With the next hundred chores
running through your head?


You'd better slow down
Don't dance so fast
Time is short
The music won't last


Ever told your child,
We'll do it tomorrow
And in your haste, not see his
sorrow?


Ever lost touch,
Let a good friendship die
'Cause you never had time
to call and say "Hi"?


You'd better slow down
Don't dance so fast
Time is short
The music won't last

When you run so fast to get somewhere
You miss half the fun of getting
there.
When you worry and hurry through your
day,
It is like an unopened gift,
Thrown away...


Life is not a race.
Do take it slower
Hear the music
Before the song is over.
      ~David L. Weatherford

Always Seeking Higher Ground,

Nora

God's Patient Guide-Stones of Remembrance

He's SEVEN! My baby boy, turned 7 on the 7th. He, who was one, when first we met in a Russian Baby Home. He had a smile that lit up a dark place, and a contagious laugh which made even stoic caregivers in white coats smile.

I couldn't believe that God had entrusted us with such a beautiful baby boy.

He has given us a gentle, patient guide (the Holy Spirit) who is willing to go with us all the way, and come into the minutest steppings of our life.
                ~A.B. Simpson

"Time flies by quickly" so I have always heard "them" say.

Everytime I look at my youngest, I realize over and over again how right "they" are. One day these boys of mine will be well on their way to becoming boy-men, and I'm sure the challenges of now will be considered simple compared to then.

 I am continually reminded that this is just a season~this time that they are young.

This season of motherhood.

It's okay to lay things aside. Alot of hobbies have had to go on the back burner along with week nights out, movies on a big screen, and long shopping expeditions... It's okay that there is still a penny stuck in the dryer door that makes a terrible scraping sound everytime I close it,  or that the floor in the kitchen can't be kept clean for more than an hour.

It's okay that things get ruined, that I never feel like I get enough sleep, and I never get to finish a novel without constant interruptions...It's even okay that our car looks like it came from the bario, and smells even worse. Or that the screen door has been ripped apart from the constant comings and goings, that there are sticky fingerprints on the TV set, or even that everyone looks nice for church when we walk in on Sunday, except for me.

because this life is not about me.

And it's been the best thing that could have happened.

 Lord let me live this short season to the fullest. Keep me strong, selfless, and filled with Your grace and mercy. Help my children know without a doubt that my love for them is true, though imperfect. Pour out Your Spirit on my offspring, making them steadfast as trees firmly planted by Your flowing stream. Let them grow up to be fed by Your water...the water of Life so they don't thirst after unrighteousness, and temporary pleasures. Call them out of the world to be claimed as Your own, wholly devoted to You.

I will pour my Spirit upon your offspring, and my blessing on your descendants. They shall spring up among the grass like willows by flowing streams. This one will say, 'I am the LORD’s,' another will call on the name of Jacob, and another will write on his hand, 'The LORD’s,' and name himself by the name of Israel.
                    ~Isaiah 44:3b-5

Always Seeking Higher Ground,

Nora

Joining Ann @ Holy Experience and the rest of the Gratitude Community by continuing the counting of multitudes of blessings, and being ever so grateful. Keeping a List of a 1000 Gifts that paves a way to a life of thankfulness.

91.) strong, healthy boys

92.) His mercies that are new every morning

93.) friends and family gathered for birthdays

94.) God's wisdom learned from my children

95.) the Gratitude Community

96.) 2nd, 3rd, 4th..etc. chances

97.) the re-meeting of childhood friends

98.) His Guiding Hand

99.) a funny story that makes for a good laugh

100.) a Godly father who is courageous in pain.

Grace~ Stones of Remembrance

Today's Walk With Him Wednesday with Ann Voskamp @ Holy Experience  is a repost from November archives, and is so very appropriate  for today's theme of Experiencing God... thank you for your grace during busy report card week. 

Late night tossing, bed clothes in disarray, remorse

holds sleep hostage, while husband's peaceful snores taunt. Heart aching with soul wretchedness,  I rise from bed, seeking rest.

Prayer bench beckons, promising peace.

Grace calls, shattering deafness, fragmenting defenses, shining brilliantly against the backdrop of sin.

I kneel, crying out Abba Father! I move toward Him, away from self-centered stagnation and decay, seeking life through the dying. He draws near, breath warm on downcast face drying hot tears erupting from volcanic core. Transgression confessing falls from lips....

The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit, A broken and a contrite heart These, O God, You will not despise.


                                               ~Psalms 51:17

..purging guilt, renewing life, and peace. His fingers brush along bruises, healing gently with delicate touch....reconciling birth darkness with blood light.

Spirit quickens as Grace does her magnificent work imputing righteousness. Tears flow in rivulets coursing down, pooling at the base of the cross. Transfusing forgiveness brings life to blood dry veins...

God is glorified when we believe with all our hearts that those who trust in Christ can never be condemned. It’s only when we receive his free gift of grace and live in the good of total forgiveness that we’re able to turn from old, sinful ways of living and walk in grace-motivated obedience.

                                         ~C.J. Mahaney

I rise from prayer bench, washed anew, fragrance of He who loves still fresh on skin....sleep comes unfettered, as I climb between cold sheets. Warmth of husband and Lord Jehovah Ropheka surround me as tranquil slumber claims spirit.

   

As far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us.
                                                             ~  Psalm 103:12

Father Redeemer, Thankyou for moving heaven and earth to save sinners who could not save themselves. Thankyou for sending your only son into hell, by way of the cross, so that we guilty ones might be reconciled to you and received into heaven.

The ultimate test of our spirituality is the measure of our amazement at the grace of God               

                              ~Dr. Martyn Lloyd-Jones

Father Healer, thank you for your gift of grace which gives me the power not to sin.  For the taste of glory while here on earth. Let evidence of my growth in grace be a thankful heart, a heart that builds a monument of stone words  praising the greatness of your mercy....praising the awesomeness of your redeeming grace....

Grace is but glory begun, and glory is but grace perfected.

                                       ~Jonathan Edwards

Always Seeking Higher Ground,

Nora

Stones of Remembrance-Love of the Father

When laundry is a mountain, meals are needing to be prepared, cleaning is endless, and child discipline and training is constant, that's when it's time to come to a full, complete STOP. Capture a moment and remember, when feelings of impotence reign, He "giveth" and "giveth" again. His power has no boundary, His grace has no measure, in trials He multiplies peace, and His love has no limits...

He giveth more peace when the burdens grow greater,
He sendeth more strength when the labors increase;
To added affliction he addeth His mercies,
To multiplied trials he multiplies peace.


When we have exhausted our store of endurance
When our strength has failed ere the day is half done,
When we reach the end of our hoarded resources
Our Father's full giving has only begun...


His love has no limit, His grace has no measure,
His power no boundary known unto men;
For out of His infinite riches in Jesus,
He giveth and giveth again.
       ~Annie Johnson Flint

I can come to Him. I can be filled by Him. I can be delivered from my weakness and through Him I can pour out unconditional love. Loving my children not based on behavior, goodness or their failures. Just truly loving them....
                                                                    

The way the Father Loves Me

Blessed is the man whose strength is in You, in whose heart are the highways to Zion. Passing through the Valley of Weeping, they make it a place of springs; the early rain also fills with blessings.
                                      ~Psalm 84: 5-6

Father of  Unconditional Love~ thank you for your gift of strength and endurance when  the burden of parenting threatens to overwhelm. For giving me the taste of the glory of your unconditional love, so that I may bestow it on my children while here on earth. Let evidence of my growth be a thankful heart, a heart that builds a monument of stone words praising the greatness of your provision....praising the awesomeness of your unconditional love....


Always Seeking Higher Ground,


Nora